Why does it have to be so complicated?

Well my pregnancy complications continue. This morning at church, I started bleeding fairly heavy. When we made it home I was very concerned about the blood and clots. Eric took the girls together Happy Meals and I called my OB who sent me to the ER. After an exam and blood work I was finally sent for an ultrasound. The tech moved the screen and I couldn't see anything. I just started crying and was trying to analyze her facial expressions. They didn't look good to me. Then she said, "well it's sucking it's thumb" and moved the screen for me. We then got to watch #3 bounce all over the screen. Tears of joy flowed! The baby looked good and it's heartbeat too. That was such a relief because I was prepared to be grieving instead of rejoicing. I'm still in the ER waiting for the doctor...who just came in and I'm being released. No real obvious reason. I read this verse that morning and felt God just speaking it to me while I waited in the room, " 17 The LORD your God is with you,
       he is mighty to save.
       He will take great delight in you,
       he will quiet you with his love,
       he will rejoice over you with singing." Zephaniah 3:17
I'm so thankful for all the help we had yesterday. Judy, Rory and Brandon and Liza all came down and helped with the girls and got me food. We felt so loved and taken care of.

Weekly Wrap Up

Mali has finished one entire week of public school. It certainly has been an adjustment, but we are all super happy with how well it is going. I really love Mali's teacher and just the way she seems to really be invested in and loving on this class of kids. You can just see that she is genuinely good teacher that loves what she does. Every day Mali has come home with something new she is has learned, even if it is a song or a saying, I love to know that she is learning! I've really enjoyed being able to walk Mali to and from school. It is a huge blessing to live this close to the school and I'm so thankful that three years ago, God provided us this house in such a perfect location next to a wonderful elementary school. The second day of school it was a little drizzle-y and we started walking to school and ended up walking in a little more of a drizzle the closer we got to school. It was just another adventure. Getting ready hasn't been as wonderful as it was the first day, but it hasn't been that horrible either. We are all pretty tired though. Every day about 4:00 Mali seems to go downhill and have some sort of a meltdown. Wednesday she actually ended up falling asleep in her room and sleeping until 6:30. Mali had one bad day where she was pushed down on the playground and landed hands first in a pile of stickers. It broke my heart to see her little hands full of little thorns when she came home. We still don't know the whole story but it seems that Mali may have provoked the pushing and that her teacher wasn't even aware of the thorns in her hand. That made me for a bad night of crying that she didn't want to go back to school and because "we don't learn about God and that's the most important thing", which again broke my heart. We talked about all the things that she learned about and how God created those things so she DID learn about God. We talked about how nature "testifies" to God. The rest of the week has gone great. Mali loves the funny story about Hermie the Worm that her teacher tells and has started saying "kiss your brain" and kissing her head and touching it to her head when her or Eleri do a good job. It is really funny! Have I said I love this teacher yet? Mali does a great job of going in each morning, putting her backpack in her "locker", signing in, moving her name to bringing a lunch, and giving her folder to her teacher. Mali seems to be making friends and points to the girls that she plays with even though she doesn't' always remember their names. The second day of school, Haley (a girl that went to BSF with Mali for a little while) brought Mali a cross stretchy bracelet and gave it to her. Her mom told us that Haley wanted Mali and her to remember to stand for Jesus at school. This same little girl also wanted to bring a New Testament to give to the teacher so she could read it out loud during story time! I've spent this summer just praying for godly friends and influences for Mali. I love how God answers my prayers so specifically! I'm not sure Mali and Haley play every day together but it was an encouragement. Mali is also noticing the things that she has in common with the other girls in her class. She told me that the boys are always crazy and don't obey but the girls are good. And speaking of boys, yesterday at drop off this boy in her class said "can I come over?" It was a little awkward and on the spot. I just told him he needed to ask his mommy or daddy first. Mali told me she had invited him to come over and get toys because he is mean and she decided to be nice to him. I'm not sure and probably shouldn't judge, but he is a little bigger than the others so I wonder if he is a little older and maybe not mean but just older. Mali also really enjoyed one day of playing with her friend Carson on the playground (He is in another class) and that when she fell down he asked if she was okay. There are no more nerves and even though some mornings have been hard, Mali seems to really enjoy it. I asked her teacher at pick up today how Mali did this week and she said "she did really great!" That made me so proud, because I know how really great Mali is!!!! Mali also did so good on her behavior chart this week that she got to pick out something from the treasure chest. She chose a jump rope. They also had a birthday party today and got juice boxes and cupcakes...sounds like a great way to end a great week. She deserved it! We are looking forward to resting this weekend.

Pump Free

Just a quick update....I'm pump free and pretty much puke free! Thank you Jesus, seriously, I'm so thankful! It hasn't meant a walk in the park or anything or that I want to go walking to the park, but its such an improvement. I've only gotten sick once in the past three days and am so thankful. I'm ready to feel "good" but will just cherish the improvements especially without medicine! Thank you Jesus!!!!! My appetite has increased some what too. I'm able to eat more than two bites of food to get by and some food actually looks good again!

Summary of Day 1

I just picked Mali up from her first day! It was exciting to watch her walk out of the building and smile at me. I was also relieved that I was not the only parent with my camera! It was nice (but hot) to walk home with Mali. School lets out right during Eleri's nap so I just took the monitor with me and went and picked up Mali. Her teacher said that she did really great. They were very organized with pick up and brought the kids out by classroom and lined them up so that we can either pick them up in our car or in person. On the way home, we talked about school. Of course I asked what her favorite part was and she said "really nothing". In typical Mali style she said "do you want to know my not favorite part?" She said that there was a mean boy that pushed down what the kids were building. She then said her favorite part was her new friend Halee. She also told me that they read The Kissing Hand. She was really excited because this morning I had drawn a heart on her hand and kissed it just like in The Kissing Hand. She said she was excited to show her teacher she already had it! Mali also said it made her sad when they read that book and that she didn't cry but her throat felt like it was chocking. That is really all that Mali has told me and is already playing all by herself. We all survived and did great!

1st day of Kindergarten

Today Mali went to school for the first time! I'm so proud of her and excited for what your future of education holds! I know she is going to do so great. She has the brain power, desire to learn and social skills to do fantastic! We started getting ready last night. I packed her lunch and showed her where all of her food was in her lunchbox. We also laid out all of her school clothes and picked out her outfit I let her choose whatever she wanted to wear. I would hold up and outfit and ask her "yes", "no", or "maybe" to narrow it down. She chose this beautiful dress that her daddy had picked out when we went school clothes shopping. We tried really hard to get the girls to bed early. This was hard since Eric got home at 7:45 and then had some yard work to do. Mali had some behavior problems and our new routine did not go as well as I wanted it to. Finally, we all sat in Mali's room to read books. Mali and Eleri went to bed at the same time, but Mali started crying. I stayed with her for about 30 minutes while she cried about going to school. She was worried about getting in trouble and was asking me questions like "What if I accidentally lie" and "what if I accidentally don't obey?" I assured her that her teacher is great and would make sure Mali understood. Mali also cried because she was going to miss me. It made my heart so sad, but I also know that she won't miss me for long, and we still get all afternoon together! I prayed with her and tucked her in. I explained to her what we would do in the morning and that I would come wake her up. I set my alarm for 6:50am and Eric was up at 6:40am, at 6:45am I heard something and found Mali on the couch. She proudly told me that "God woke me up". I turned cartoons on for her and cuddled for a little bit with her until I had to get ready. Mali did a great job getting ready this morning. We had no battles or problems. We ate breakfast together and then I watched her get ready. She even brushed her hair and did a great job all by herself. I just sat and watched her in amazement at how grown up she is and how capable she is. After she got ready, we went outside for a little photo shoot. Mali got to watch a few more minutes of cartoons and I got everything ready to go. Our final step was getting the stroller out and going in to wake Eleri up. Eleri was not too happy about that or being put in the stroller without mommy time/diaper change/breakfast. But we made it out the door and walked to school. Walking to school is when it really hit me that the change was happening. We took a few pictures outside and with her teacher. After putting up her lunchbox we went to her locker. Halee Quirk, a little girl we met through Andrea (its her cousin) and whom Mali has played with before took a picture with her, grabbed her hand and said "let's go". I could tell Mali was a little nervous but she was so brave still. I peeked in at her in the classroom and got tears in my eyes! Then the teacher asked if Mali had given me my letter, which she hadn't, so Mali brought it to me. I read the first line "she started school this morning and she seemed so very small...."! This was NOT a letter but absolute heart break. I tried to make it through the doors wondering who could see the tears in my eyes. I got over while waiting in line to get out the door, but once I made it home and read the rest of the "letter" I cried and cried. I can not wait to go pick her up in about ten minutes and hear all about her day. Unfortunately, she probably will not tell me anything. It be so much easier if I just had a live streaming video feed into her classroom and could see all that she was learning and how great she was doing!;)

New Beds

I'm stumped on creativity right now (see post title) so here it is plain and simple. We bought the girls new beds. I wasn't really ready for this change yet but Eric thought it best to get it done while he was home. Last week the beds came in and were set up in Mali's room. We got a daybed for Mali and a trundle bed that will be Eleri's. I've had to tell Mali that Eleri is not allowed to sleep in a big girl bed until she is 2 but Mali is anxious to have a roommate (or so she thinks). I also found some great bedding on sale at TJ Max. My mom made the beds and got them ready. The girls have really enjoyed playing underneath and on the beds. Unfortunately, Mali some how found finger nail polish (story of my life right?) and decided to paint a dolls toenails on her NEW white bedding!!!!! I was really frustrated but then realized that at least I got the cheap bedding instead of the pottery barn quilts/bedspreads that I was really wanting to buy.

1st OB appointment

On Thursday I had my first OB appointment. It was so nice to have my mom here to watch the girls because it was right during Eleri's nap and it was much more peaceful to go by myself. Besides getting sick at his office, it was a good appointment. I've lost about 12 lbs since September, so give or take 10 lbs. Because of this he was not willing to take me off the pump even though I asked him several times repeatedly (nicely of course). Instead I've continued the pump and added B6 vitamins to my daily intake. The burning question of course is am I still sick: YES!!! Although I feel like it is improving a little maybe down to once or twice a day. I've had several people mention that maybe without the pump I'd still be getting sick 7 times a day. However, for the cost of it I should be getting sick zero times a day. The best part of the appointment was my surprise ultrasound. #3 looked great and was moving like crazy. We have another very active baby on our hands. Its actually such a praise because of all the lack of nutrition #3 has received. My OB and the nurse were laughing at how active #3 was. He asked me if I wanted to take a "peek" but without Eric there we decided not to, and plus last time my OB "peeked" he was wrong! So we will just wait and see what #3 shall be! Here is a picture of me and baby at 12 weeks. Its a horrible picture of me but having a good picture with three people in it was too much work!:)

Meet and Greet

Mali had teacher meet and greet on Thursday also. We took her school supplies into the classroom and then she sorted them. She really was even more excited and told me she can't wait to go to kindergarten. All weekend she has been counting down the days while I'm trying to hang on to them. Grammie went with us and took lots of pictures. Eleri cooperated in her stroller while we sorted and then took a little tour of the school. We saw Mali's "locker", the girls bathroom, cafeteria, and library. Then we made a little stop to visit Mrs. Thiessen (Coach Thiessen's wife) who teaches 3rd grade. Mali was very excited to see her. Mrs. Thiessen told Mali that she can come down and visit her anytime, which I had to clarify once we left! I am glad to know she has another adult at the school that cares about her. I'm still so excited about her teacher who gave her a hug on the way out. Her teacher still is having trouble pronouncing her name, but we knew this day was coming. It will just make Mali "tough minded" as her daddy would say. I've also realized my error in not having Mali take a picture with her teacher, and I think tomorrow may be a little too crazy for a photo opp. We stopped for PTA snowcones and so I could turn in my PTA form (I signed up for classroom helper under the premise of any amount of time is not too small). We actually have ended up knowing a lot of parents and kids that will attend Sleepyhollow this year. And whether we want it to be here or not, I'm headed to Mali's room to pick out her first day of school outfit! HERE WE GO.......

Faces of Eleri

Grammie came to town

Last Wednesday, my mom surprised us with a visit to take care of me. It was such a huge help to have her cook our meals, clean up after our meals, let me rest, change poopie diapers, make our beds every morning, do all of our laundry every day, clean, clean, clean, and love on the girls! She had to leave today and we were sad to see her go, I'm not sure how I'll do with out her here!

A-D-O-R-A-B-L-E

Aren't these girls adorable and absolutely ready to support the Golden Sandstorm this year? These outfits turned out so cute, so much so Eric thinks I should start making them (I didn't make these, but he's confident I could and could make good money!;)
We had our first scrimmage yesterday. It was really hot and really hard. I'm not sure if we will survive football season this year, but at least we made it (barely) through our first game even with Eleri getting hit in the face with a football.

And so it begins...

Last night we had parent orientation for Mali for kindergarten. Eric had football practice so my mom (yes she is is still here helping, isn't that great?) watched Eleri and Mali and I prepared to go. Mali didn't eat dinner and had a huge meltdown saying her tummy hurt. She then went and layed in her bed. Right before it was time to go she said she felt better but then had a huge meltdown over trying to find her blankie. We finally were ready and walked down to the school. We found out that her teacher is going to be Mrs. Von Netzer. We got to meet her and then sat at her table for the meeting. It was all basic, too boring for a blog, information. They start at 8:05 and let out at 1:30. The principal has been at Sleephollow for 20 years and you could tell she was very invested in the school. Over and over we heard about how academic Sleepyhollow is which makes me very happy. Then the principal had to mention that this is the class of 2023!!!! Can you believe it? I thought I was going to cry right then just thinking about how if I blink I will be at senior year orientation in 2023. Just sitting in the meeting, I talked to three parents that were sending siblings to Mrs. Von Netzer. They had requested her after their oldest had her and loved her. That made me feel really good. Although Mali did point out that she wanted the really young, blonde headed teacher. We also knew one little girl in Mali's class from BSF and another girl in her class is the young cousin of a good friend and Mali has played with her before. I completely feel a peace about her teacher and know that this is who God has for her. Her teacher is not super young (she has a 4th grader and then preschool twins) which I think will be good for Mali. She seems really fun and personable but definitely not a pushover either. Eric said, can you imagine a class of 22 Mali's? Mali had her head down on the table and kept saying how loud it was and that she didn't like it. Looking back, I can so tell her stomach ache and then her behavior at the meeting was nervousness. Poor sweet girl. I just see this beautiful, confident (maybe overly at some point), assertive, incredibly social little girl that has absolutely no reason to be nervous because she will do so great! But then I remember that I threw up in my lunch box the first day of first grade and still ended up loving school as I got older. Eric was able to come to the last of the meeting, which was probably good, because then it was time for PTA stuff, and I had NO clue. Eric signed us up for a family membership of PTA, a year book, and then bought two shirts for Mali. Now I have to decide what I want to volunteer for with the PTA, there is a long list. I really want to be involved but I'm not sure how much I can do with my other two around. After the meeting, we went to Mali's classroom. Her little eyes lit up!!!! She loved seeing her name everywhere. We saw her chair and her box. Mali loved looking at all the posters and the reading center in her room. She really came out of her nervousness once she saw the classroom, as you can see in the different pictures. Once we were in the classroom we found out that another friend from BSF was in Mali's class, Pablo Davalos. He has a twin brother and Mali has played with them at BSF, at the park, and they've been to her birthday party once. I also found out that her teacher is cousins with one of the coach's wives that we know wel. I'm excited about all of the connections that Mali already has and can see how God has just prepared for the way for her. I'm still in denial a little, not really ready to let go of her, but I know behind all that she is going to learn and be so excited. Life is changing and it will be really hard I think, I don't even know exactly how it all will change, but there is so much excitement too! We will go back up there on Thursday to bring her school supplies and sort them.

Since I've had the lovely pump and fanny pack installed life hasn't been easy. I had hoped it would work wonders. We've spent the past two days trying to get the dosage correct and slowly increasing it so that my skin isn't too irritated. Which is another side effect. Zofran is injected right into my skin but is an irritant so this means that my "site" has to be moved regularly. Today the nurse came and removed my old site and put a new one in. My old site is pretty red and swollen and painful. Yesterday my dad and Terry came and helped me and then last night my mom showed up and is helping me out. Yesterday I had 7 "episodes" , including one at Chickfila, and I've only been sick twice today, so it's an improvement but I'm still naseous. My dosage is now at it's max at 1mL an hour and I'm hoping this works!!!

And you did it again?

In a nutshell, this is what I've been asked many times today. It goes like this, "I'm so sorry you're sick, is this your first? Were you sick with the others? (and implied) And you did it again?"My pregnancy drama has continued. About 1.5 weeks ago my OB prescribed Zofran and I was so excited about it helping and curing my all day sickness. It seemed to decrease my episodes some but I was still sick and it took about an hour to start working and was wearing off about 1-2 hours before I could take my next dose. During those times, I was getting pretty sick. On Friday I called my nurse back and asked what we could do. I'm not so sure how worse it is this pregnancy, but it has its moments, but its harder this time. Having a very active 18 month old and active 5 year old just takes it out of me and I'm not willing to sacrifice them any longer if medicine can help me. The nurse wanted me to go through the weekend and see if taking an acid blocker helped at all. I took prevacid and my episodes actually got worse. I couldn't keep anything down all weekend; water, food...nothing. It was a difficult and hard weekend. My own cure has been to not eat or drink at all. I know, I know its not good for the baby or me but at this point it was easier than spending my whole day with my head in the toilet and Eleri and Mali banging on the bathroom door or running out the front door naked. I was barely above functioning and survival. Friday my nurse had said that depending on how the weekend went we could do a zofran pump or IV if I was dehydrated. I had made some possible plans for the girls depending on what needed to happen. So as soon as the office opened I called in today to say that it was worse. I had lab work drawn and spent all day waiting on phone calls. Around 11am, the IV solutions lady, Holly called me back. She made my day! She was so wonderful and understanding and actually advocating for me. They were still waiting on my insurance to approve the pump. I was hoping for an IV just so that I would get over the hump and start feeling better. In the end, my doctor (whom Holly labeled as very conservative) just ordered the pump with IV if I continued to loose weight. Speaking of, the nurse needed my accurate weight. We don't own a scale here because I don't want to fall in the trap of always weighing myself or sending that message to my girls, and the nurse didn't have a scale, so Eric scrambled to find batteries so that I could weight myself with the Wii. I've lost about 8lbs since I found out I was pregnant. Anyway, Holly came over and brought me all the supplies and the lovely pump in a very nice fanny pack that Rory would be proud of! (its a joke Rory) She was awesome to me and answered all my questions above and beyond. As she was pulling up, I had a friend that was coming to pick Mali up to swim and it ended up that my friend's (who has older kids) daughter's best friend is Holly's daughter! It was a fun God connection to experience today. They are close family friends. Then when they dropped Mali off, Holly's daughter was with them. Also, Holly's son plays football for Eric. Finally about 5:30, the home health nurse came and hooked me. She wasn't sure how to do it, so she called Holly (who also lives by use) who showed up at our house 5 minutes later and walked the nurse through it. It is a catheter port that is stuck into a site on my leg and then the port runs to the lovely machine (in the fanny pack) that administers .5mL of zofran every hour on a constant basis. This is what is supposed to be better is the constant flow of medicine. Holly assured me several times that this was ok and safe for the baby. So here's to another week of hopefulness that I will get better. The only downside is the expense. We have to meet our deductible before our insurance starts covering. Thankfully through my good health I've knocked my deductible down $500, but lets just say, I will meet my deductible in about 12 days. I suppose it all evens out with the delivery and I"m already trying to think of all my doctor appointments I can get in since my deductible will be met. Eric also insists that this means that getting my "tubes tied" will be free and I'm obligated now. So, here is to feeling better and being a good mommy and good wife again. I'm so thankful for the people God has used to love on us during this time. I have awesome friends that are willing to drive from Lubbock to get the girls even though their family just had the stomach bug, an amazing sister in law that is willing to do whatever she can for me, parents willing to come down and help, a husband who proudly spent $23 at Wal-Mart buying me snacks and pedialyte to nurse me back to health, and friends willing to take my girls swimming. Lovely, high quality pictures...I know!

It starts young

Teaching my girls about a relationship with Jesus starts from the very beginning...this is just a picture of how Eleri is already learning about our King

School Supplies

On Thursday, I took Mali to buy her school supplies for the very first time. It wasn't a horrible trip, but I hope to do it a little more strategically next year (primarily NOT be pregnant, pregnant brain is not good for school supply shopping)! Mali had fun with it all but I think she was a little disappointed that she didn't get to pick anything out. Sleepyhollow has a list and boldly states that items are not to be labeled, so I'm assuming they all go into a big stock pile.

Eleri's first haircut

On Friday, Eleri had her first haircut. Mandy at The Fix, just snipped her little baby hair/mullet off in the back. It is always sad to let that sweet, curly, whispy, soft baby hair go. Photography courtesy of Mali. I took some before pictures, but seem to be missing them from my camera!:(