18 months old

Eleri is 18 months old today!!! I attempted a photo shoot at what I thought was a great location yesterday, but it didn't turn out as amazing as I would have liked. Eleri is doing great at 18 months old. She does very little that is reminiscent of her baby-ness. Eleri has finally become a good sleeper and napper. Her naps have moved to about 2.5-3 hours a day which is a nice chunk of time for me to get things done (or nap myself and get things done). Eleri still loves to eat, preferring beef over chicken. Eleri is becoming Miss Independent and gets VERY upset when she isn't allowed to express her independence. She wants to do what she wants to do and the way she wants to do it. Eric thinks she will be more independent that even Mali. We have had many many temper tantrums from this girl. And these include flailing on the floor and screaming. Eleri still loves shoes and wants to be wearing her shoes all day. Eleri loves playing with Mali and really just goes along with the pretend play Mali tells her to do. I think she must be confused because Mali loves to play that Eleri is the mommy and she is the baby and I'm the Sunday School teacher. But Eleri goes right along with it as much as an 18 month old can. Eleri loves being outside and playing with balls. She also enjoys swinging when we play in the backyard. Making messes and being mischievous are really Eleri's favorite thing. We currently have a clogged toilet that has a bar of soap stuck in it thanks to Miss Eleri. She is always pushing the limits a little (not another one, or maybe its just being a toddler). If we play out front in the water the next thing I know she is dunking her head in the run off water! Eleri is a climber!!! We had moved Mali's chair up on her desk so that Eleri couldn't climb it, but she has now discovered how to climb up into her highchair and our bar height table chairs. She also likes to climb on top of the toilets and Mali's bed. She is really good at climbing but it requires much more supervision from this busy mom. Along with her mischievousness, the other night I was sick and shut her out of the bathroom. She was crying and knocking on the door...but then it got quiet. When I was done, I came out to find her outside and naked!!! This sounds nothing like another little girl that ran away naked to the park in Dumas when she was three. Eleri is so goofy too. She loves to just laugh at everybody and everything and has the cutest smile with her scrunched up eyes and nose! She loves just being goofy and trying to make herself, us and Mali laugh and she gets the greatest belly laugh out of it. The other day we were sitting on the couch and she accidentally burped. It made us laugh, and so she kept trying to burp again which was an even funnier sound and we just laughed and laughed. Eleri is also beginning the potty training stage. We take her diaper off and set her on the toilet at her request or when she has a poopy diaper. She "wipes" and flushes the toilet. I'm excited she is getting ready but I'm not sure I'm ready. But I do strongly believe in going with my children's interest when they are interested, so I guess I'll just have to suck it up and do it. The previously mentioned clogged toilet and previously mentioned me getting sick have begun to send a mixed message I'm afraid but hopefully they will all be corrected soon. Eleri is talking quite a bit now too and says many many words. I looked at her with such thankfulness for how she has turned out despite my lacking as a parent of two. Eleri loves to read right now too. I think she would sit in my lap and be read to all day if she could be. Another cute Eleri thing, is she counts 1, 2, 3 and holds up her little finger right next to her mouth. She also "prays". When I pray at meals times, she curls her hands up underneath her chin and will say amen after I say it. It is very cute! As always, I know that there is so much more to this sweet little girl, but this is what I can think of right now.

Another day, another ultrasound

Today I had another ultrasound. I sure am high maintenance when I'm pregnant, I guess it makes up for me not being high maintenance in normal life!;) In the last two/three weeks I've been bleeding and so this was just to check on baby again. When the tech put in all my information, I told her that we still weren't really sure how far along I was but that if I could give her the date of conception that it would probably be right. Sure enough she said that #3 was measuring exactly with that date of conception. So without further ado, real due date is March 3, 2011 and I'm 8-9 weeks along. Only three to five more weeks of my head remaining in the toilet! Yes, I'm sick and exhausted. In fact today I took an hour long nap and wanted to sleep more! The mornings and evenings are the worst and evenings the most difficult. I really can't eat dinner at all or keep it down if I do. I can't stand the look, smell or taste of chicken and as I get sick off something, I can no longer eat that. The ginger beer is helping some but isn't full proof. Eric said he's willing to pay for a prescription of Zofran for me my OB will prescribe it. We will see. This sure is hard the third time around (and really the fourth since my paperwork reads 4 pregnancies. Can you believe I've really been pregnant four times?). It was wonderful seeing #3 on the screen. Especially since baby looks more like a...baby. Can you see the little legs? I saw the heartbeat right away. That always sends a shock of amazingness through me. Then we heard the good strong, fast heartbeat. It was at 170 this time. Everything with the baby looked good. The tech did say she could see evidence of bleeding around the gestational sac but with baby healthy and heartbeat so strong it wasn't a concern to her and probably something that will self correct. We are trusting God! I'm so thankful for this baby but had a realization/talking time with God. Since God had clearly told us to do this, I think part of me expected his blessing and favor on this pregnancy. In my mind some what translating into easy, fun pregnancy. Which it is not. Then God just showed me that just because I'm obedient or follow his path doesn't mean its going to be easy. Carrie helped me to see that even when Jesus told the disciples to go out on a boat, he KNEW a storm was coming, and told them anyway. And like we've been studying in church, Paul was absolutely in God's will but was imprisoned, beat, stoned...etc. So, with God's strength I will get through #3. The other night after being sick, I asked Eric to tell me it was going to be worth it. He was silent. But then said "in five years". Once again, I find myself saying, in two years this will be worth it. I see how funny and amazing Eleri is at this age and know that in a short season #3 will be at that adorable stage too.

Cheyenne Mountain Zoo

After Brandon's wedding, we decided to take the girls to the Cheyenne Mountain Zoo since we were so close to Colorado Springs and it was Eric's last official week of summer. We hoped that Eleri would nap in the car but just as it goes anytime you plan soemthing fun for your kids, she didn't nap. We ate lunch at Qdobas (our favorite burrito place thanks to Laura!) and then arrived at the zoo right at nap time. Perfect timing! It was also very very hot. Eric rented a wagon and bought the girls cute, pink safari hats while I waited for my mom and Zina who were joining us. The giraffes were too hot to want to eat their crackers, so Eleri ate them for them. Then we were on to the rest of the animals. Our highlight was probably watching the grizzly bear play in the water, the girls riding the ponies and petting the snake. Eleri also loved the turtle. We were sprinkled on at one point, which felt so nice and then ran into the Ape area right before a huge downpour hit. We waited out the rain for the most part and looked at the primates. One of the primates was playing at the glass with Eleri. We left the zoo and said good-byes and Eleri was out fast! Eric made a stop at Dillards in Colorado Springs while Eleri and I slept in the car. We stayed in a hotel that night and then the next morning drove into Castle Rock for Eric to do some back to school shopping since he will be in the classroom this year and was "in need" of new clothes. After our shopping excursion that was pretty successfully, we headed all hte way home. We were stopped in standstill traffic in Pueblo for about 30 minutes which caused us to not quite make it all the way back home so we stayed with Mimi and Papa that night and let them spoil the girls a little.

Kindergarten Woes

The past few weeks Mali has started to become a little anxious about going to kindergarten. Some of her woes are that she won't be able to go to Wal-Mart with me any more and the more heart breaking one, that she won't be able to learn about God. During one of our kindergarten discussions, Mali said she was excited about going to kindergarten and learning about God. I made the mistake of telling her that she wouldn't be learning about God like she did in preschool. I should've have been more thoughtful when I talked with her about it. Maybe saying that we can always learn about God no matter where we are, because that is so true and I want her to know that. I received more of a "spiritual education" at a secular university than my brother received at a Christian college. Or maybe I could have said, "you can teach people about God." At any rate, I'm trying to make up for my careless words now. We have purchased a backpack and a few school clothes. Eric has made sure that his big girl well be well dressed and fit in as much as possible at Sleepyhollow. We still have to get school supplies, hopefully I will this week, and end my nightmares about it being 7:30 on the first day of school and Mali not having school supplies. I've been thinking a lot about how I'm going to start having to pack lunches every day!!!! And how I will have to be thrifty and creative. I'm still unsure what to do about drinks and how to go about that the cheapest. I asked Mali if water bottles would work for her and she said "yes." We are used to eating leftover at lunch so this is going to stretch me. And, I realized, I will have to wake her up more than likely rather than let her sleep until she naturally wakes up. Not that she ever sleeps too late, but we will need to be prepared! Oh, the winds of change are blowing! On a positive note of this subject, we read in her Princess Bible about singing the song "He's Got the Whole World in His Hands" but trading out your worry, so we've been singing "He's got Mali going to Kindergarten, in His Hands...". I love it and she loves it (I'm actually going to use that little technique with clients too!) I'm in prayer for this sweet big girl and know she will do fantastic. We each have our own worries and concerns.

A Nice Day for a "White" Wedding

On July 19, 2010 my brother, Brandon, got married. It was fun but exhausting weekend. The girls and I went up Thursday with my dad to start getting things ready for the wedding. Friday my mom, zina, and I hosted a bridal luncheon for Liza in La Veta, Colorado at a bed and breakfast there. My mom did a great job planning it and preparing for it. After the luncheon, we went back into Cuchara and got ready for the rehearsal. The rehearsal went well although Brandon put me in charge and my brain capacity seems to be very limited right now, but with help from the other members of the White family we got it all figured out. After the rehearsal we went back to the cabin and had pizza from the Dog Bar on the deck. It was fun to relax and hear Brandon and his friends tell stories from their crazy days at Wayland. My dad tried to get stories about Liza but her mom (translated) that she was a very good child. After the dinner, the girls and guys parted ways. At about 8pm, I went up to Liza's condo for a Mehendi party. I was so excited about them incorporating this tradition into their wedding. Liza and all the bridesmaids had our hands painted with henna. The bride goes first and Liza's alone took four hours. Everyone took pity on me and let me go next. I didn't get home until 2am which is super super late for me especially being pregnant but I was glad that I was able to stay since Liza really wanted us to do this. Saturday morning came quickly and we spent time helping Brandon get ready for the reception and ceremony. After lunch and an early nap for Eleri, I started getting ready so that I could help Brandon with the flowers. I went to take pictures of Liza getting ready but then had to leave to go get all of the girls' flowers and bring them up to the cabin. By that time, it was time to get the girls ready and meet for pictures. We met at the ski resort base to take pictures. Liza looked absolutely beautiful. The highlight of pictures had to be when the groomsmen carried Liza across the resort to take pictures. I can't wait to see the pictures! I was fortunate enough to be able to drive Liza down to the ceremony, after a potty break at the cabin. The ceremony went really great. They did a great job choosing beautiful music that captured their personalities. My little flower girls looked beautiful and did a good job even though Eleri's pomander broke before the ceremony! Bryon Potter, Brandon's high school friend and college roommate, performed the ceremony and did good job, Mali leaned over to me and said "I really like this story". After the ceremony and more pictures we went to the reception that was held in the town of Cuchara at a rental cabin along the river. It was very pretty and serene. I was exhausted and just wanted to rest so I slacked in the area of pictures. I'm so sad I never got pictures with Brandon and Liza and myself or the girls!!! We had a good evening and enjoyed spending time with family and friends. Our family left early but the rest of the wedding party and friends stayed on to celebrate into the evening. We are excited to have Liza as a permanent member of the White family. She is so kind and loving and understanding with our girls. And with Brandon!;) congratulations Mr. & Mrs. White. We loved being a part of your special day...have fun in Hawaii!

Such a sweet sound

Today the girls and I heard one of the sweetest sounds...#3's heartbeat. I had another ultrasound today and everything looked great and sounded great. The heartbeat was at 117 for all of those gender predictors out there. No signs of problems at all. I have started throwing up but God just really spoke to me that it will be okay, this will just make me depend on him even more. And that I'm okay with. I might have to ask Eric to shower immediately after mowing the lawn and might have some extreme rage that the spicy chicken sandwich I ordered was not in the bag but regular chicken sandwich that I can not stomach was...but we'll manage!:)
Here is another picture!

GOALLLL

No, I did not watch even a fraction of the soccer stuff that was going on, whatever it was called!;)
I just wanted to share this so that I have a chance to come back to this one day, or every day for that matter, and to share with my friends too.
A while back, a friend had sent me this new blog, Inspired to Action. She has a free e-book for moms on how to maximize your morning. It has helped me so much, well until I got pregnant again!;) On her blog, she also encourages moms to make a mission statement. I hate that kind of stuff and always have. I hate setting goals and defining objectives, blah blah blah. It makes my head and stomach hurt and just feels like a waste of time. I just want to get to it. And, the reality for me has been that my goal is simply obedience to God. If he calls me to do something I do it, if he tells me no in an area I don't do it. Simple. God called me to stay at home to raise my kids during this season of life. I did it...do it. No goals or objectives needed. Except that I go to bed nearly every day with regret that I just didn't read to Mali or Eleri one more time (or any time at all), that I cleaned too much or that I didn't clean at all. Just loads of regret and guilt that having #2 seemed to exacerbate as I'm sure #3 will too. Then in the shower, which is for all accounts and purposes my real quiet time and time with God, I felt God talking to me about a goal and a mission statement for motherhood. I had read this post that day:
http://inspiredtoaction.com/2010/07/motherhood-and-identity-comparison-and-the-list-you-need-to-tape-to-your-forehead
So in the shower, God and I discussed what my mission statement as a mom should be. And here it is

To provide my children with a safe, loving environment at home where I teach them and help them to learn while also teaching them about loving God.

So now the past few nights when I've laid in bed and the guilt (the Enemy) is whispering in my ear, I can say yes today I was a good mom because I was home with them and gave them a safe place to learn. I taught Eleri how to say bubble and that once again that was a cat not a dog. I taught Mali a verse about arguing and complaining and helped her to understand to rest when her body was out of control with crying. Even though those were just a few moments in the long span of the day, I did "well" (which is even hard for me to say). This certainly does not mean I'm going to do the minimal job but that there will be days when there are moments and not hours that fulfill this statement and I won't bog myself down in the guilt that time is just slipping away from me and that my girls will not be raised well.
I hope this helps someone else that reads this blog too!